HOW ED PUTS UP WITH OUR STUPIC FUCKING ANTICS EVERY DAY
Edgard Gianesi arrives to work every day wondering "what the hell am I in for today?"
By Thomas Nitti, published on May 16, 2024
Ed has been with the DAVID network for nine years, but is experiencing a new type of deranged. Credit: DAVID Miami.
David Miami has officially named Edgard Gianesi its new Chief Creative Officer, and whew, is he in for it now. Gianesi arrives from David’s São Paulo, Brazil, office, where things were probably a bit less unhinged than Miami.
Though Ed has already been at David Miami for several months, reports from employees within the office indicate that he has “ain’t seen nothin’ yet.”
“He missed the iguana naming party where we played beer pong with kings cake babies. And he wasn’t here for the blood type reveal ceremony. So we’ll just have to top that,” says Associate Creative Director Sarah Dembkowski. “We hope that our launch party for our original song, ‘Horse Girl,’ will really take it to the next level.”
When asked for comment, Edgard simply replied “what?” and made a face that onlookers could only describe as a mixture of confusion and concern.
Many in the agency simply believe that Ed takes his employee’s shenanigans day-by-day, burying it away in his subconscious mind until it develops into a deep, incomprehensible trauma.
“Sometimes I think I dropped acid, but then I realize I’m sitting in a brainstorm with Ander,” says equally traumatized Group Creative Director Alejandro Juli. “I live in a constant state of fear due to the sheer amount of mentally unstable individuals I work with on a daily basis.
Early reports now say that several in the agency has donned bald caps in a demented, cult-like ritualistic celebration of the new CCO’s birth.
